I have lived a life of with high expectations placed on me. As a child growing up, I had HIGH expectations from my parents. I resented these expectations, but I grew to appreciate them later in life because it taught me to aim high.
However, as I have reflected on this, I am not sure that these HIGH expectations were the most helpful in my life. I am learning that having the right expectations are much more important that having high expectations. Because of my upbringing, I learned to develop HIGH expecations in my life. I have achieved alot; but I also have had alot of disappointment.
High expectations may or may not be achieved; but the right expectation is carefully thought out and achievable. I have learned that high expectation is a hope, but the right expectation is a plan. Confidence is built as we achieve and plan. In mentoring children I hope to set the right expecations for them, not just a high one. I certainly have no intention of aiming low; but I want to have plenty of opportunities for celebrating successes and give recognition for such.
Giving recognition for success to a child is a big motivator. It builds confidence and self assurance. It helps to continually raise the bar of success. We must find ways to celebrate improvements and not just criterion met so that we have success across the board in classrooms and meet what should be the ultimate expectation of educators- creating life long learners.
The 5 Chaps
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Relationship is the Key to Teaching!
I can remember my fourth grade teacher vividly- Mrs. Eason. She was my favorite in my school career. It was in 4th grade that I can remember wanting to become a teacher. I have been thinking about what makes a good teacher. A good teacher is one who has lasting impact. Mrs. Eason did that for me. I may not remember the specific lessons and objectives for that 4th grade classroom; but I remember the feeling of wanting to succeed in her room. I remember the culture of Mrs. E's classroom. It was the culture that made a lasting impression on me.
My 4th grade year was a significant year because my third grade year was terrible. I can remember being belittled and stressed in my third grade year. I can remember losing confidence that year and hating school. But it was in Mrs. E's class that my excitement for learning and school returned.
Mrs. E was approachable, she was compassionate. In my elementary years, I had a love for talking. I loved it so much, that many times I ended up by the teacher's desk each year to control my enthusiasm. Each year this happened was heart-wrenching for me. My 1st and 3rd grade teacher had a way of making me feel terrible about my lack of self-control. My 2nd grade teacher was more encouraging and gave me benchmarks of accomplishment as I earned my group privileges back. But it was Mrs. Eason that took the time to help me redirect my energies. Yes, I did end up at her desk a time or two; but I knew she cared. She did not just put me there to get me out of her hair- she engaged me, she helped me.
Mrs. E created a classroom where it was okay to fail and it was okay to ask questions. Everyone makes mistakes. But when we stop trying is when true failure begins. I came to understand that year that I had value to add to the group. For 3 years, I had been shoved away;but it 4th grade, something changed. I learned to channel my gift of gab in to cooperative groups and in creative expression through art. Not only did I become successful at school, I began to develop a desire to teach as well.
Looking back, I realize that the key to Mrs. Eason's success in her classroom was investment. She apparently understood that her relationship with her students is what would make learning successful.
I have read the quote, "Learning is fundamentally an act of self confidence." If teachers come to this understanding, the entire culture of school would change. We must look for ways to develop the self confidence of our students every day. Our classrooms need become a laboratory where it is okay to explore possibilities. Students feel safe if they get the wrong answer as long as we learn together how to get the correct one. It is okay to express an opinion as long as we are respectful of others. And it is exciting to explore new questions and inquiries.
Students will connect to this classroom culture as teachers look past the black and white of their planbooks and really invest in the lives of their students.
My 4th grade year was a significant year because my third grade year was terrible. I can remember being belittled and stressed in my third grade year. I can remember losing confidence that year and hating school. But it was in Mrs. E's class that my excitement for learning and school returned.
Mrs. E was approachable, she was compassionate. In my elementary years, I had a love for talking. I loved it so much, that many times I ended up by the teacher's desk each year to control my enthusiasm. Each year this happened was heart-wrenching for me. My 1st and 3rd grade teacher had a way of making me feel terrible about my lack of self-control. My 2nd grade teacher was more encouraging and gave me benchmarks of accomplishment as I earned my group privileges back. But it was Mrs. Eason that took the time to help me redirect my energies. Yes, I did end up at her desk a time or two; but I knew she cared. She did not just put me there to get me out of her hair- she engaged me, she helped me.
Mrs. E created a classroom where it was okay to fail and it was okay to ask questions. Everyone makes mistakes. But when we stop trying is when true failure begins. I came to understand that year that I had value to add to the group. For 3 years, I had been shoved away;but it 4th grade, something changed. I learned to channel my gift of gab in to cooperative groups and in creative expression through art. Not only did I become successful at school, I began to develop a desire to teach as well.
Looking back, I realize that the key to Mrs. Eason's success in her classroom was investment. She apparently understood that her relationship with her students is what would make learning successful.
I have read the quote, "Learning is fundamentally an act of self confidence." If teachers come to this understanding, the entire culture of school would change. We must look for ways to develop the self confidence of our students every day. Our classrooms need become a laboratory where it is okay to explore possibilities. Students feel safe if they get the wrong answer as long as we learn together how to get the correct one. It is okay to express an opinion as long as we are respectful of others. And it is exciting to explore new questions and inquiries.
Students will connect to this classroom culture as teachers look past the black and white of their planbooks and really invest in the lives of their students.
Monday, March 3, 2008
Life Lesson 2-- Make Eye Contact
When someone is speaking to you, keep your eyes on the speaker at all times. When someone makes a comment, turn and face that person.
This helps you as an individual to develop confidence and it brings respect to what you are saying when you establish and keep eye contact. As we grow older in life, this is a key lesson to take into all of our relationships, especially that of business.
As a mentor, we must exhibit this life lesson. Looking our children in the eye when we are talking will bring connection and confidence between you and your children. It will also teach our children the habit of this life lesson.
This helps you as an individual to develop confidence and it brings respect to what you are saying when you establish and keep eye contact. As we grow older in life, this is a key lesson to take into all of our relationships, especially that of business.
As a mentor, we must exhibit this life lesson. Looking our children in the eye when we are talking will bring connection and confidence between you and your children. It will also teach our children the habit of this life lesson.
How to Develop a Love for Reading
We must look at reading as not just a subject, but a foundation for life. Reading is more than decoding and comprehension . It is a door that opens up new information and new imaginations. Establishing a life long love for reading is not only educational, it can be therapeautic as readers can lose themselves in a whole other world.
But, how as educators can we develop this love for reading?
1. Be a mentor to your children. If we as parents and educators exhibit a love for reading, it will catch to our children.
2. Listen to books on CD, but PLEASE take the time to stop and discuss!! There are so many opportunities lost without a good book discussion. Need some help for some starters? Go to www.learninglinks.com. They have thousand book related units.
3. Visit the library often! Nothing can replace the experience of being in a building full of books and having the regular experience of checking out books of interest.
4. Remember that our goal is to build confidence in reading, not be the reading police and continually point out weaknesses. We want to develop the joy and fun of reading. If a child really enjoying the story and gets stuck-- it is not the time to insert your phonics lesson. Make a note to do that later. Simply help with the word and continue on into the world they are getting lost in.
5. For multiple abilities, require once a month book reports on ability level. This is another way to instill confidence.
6. Find a book club or start one yourself, even in the family. Families can have their own book club by reading together and discussing the book. Or even assigning chapters to be read by dinner so that the book discussion may be done over dinner.
7. Look for ways to make reading relevant with movies, plays, activities.
But, how as educators can we develop this love for reading?
1. Be a mentor to your children. If we as parents and educators exhibit a love for reading, it will catch to our children.
2. Listen to books on CD, but PLEASE take the time to stop and discuss!! There are so many opportunities lost without a good book discussion. Need some help for some starters? Go to www.learninglinks.com. They have thousand book related units.
3. Visit the library often! Nothing can replace the experience of being in a building full of books and having the regular experience of checking out books of interest.
4. Remember that our goal is to build confidence in reading, not be the reading police and continually point out weaknesses. We want to develop the joy and fun of reading. If a child really enjoying the story and gets stuck-- it is not the time to insert your phonics lesson. Make a note to do that later. Simply help with the word and continue on into the world they are getting lost in.
5. For multiple abilities, require once a month book reports on ability level. This is another way to instill confidence.
6. Find a book club or start one yourself, even in the family. Families can have their own book club by reading together and discussing the book. Or even assigning chapters to be read by dinner so that the book discussion may be done over dinner.
7. Look for ways to make reading relevant with movies, plays, activities.
Fear Vs. Trust
In a family, civic group, classroom, etc.; it is important that leaders create the proper culture in their group. Many times we try to manage our groups by fear. We threaten with loss of privileges and treats. We sometimes hope that fear of a punishment will motivate our children to make the correct choices. While punishments and rewards have their place in classroom and family management, using fear to train chilren has no place in our society. Yet it happens all the time; and most of the time, very innocently.
I personally was raised this way. I feared spankings, I feared being yelled at, I feared losing privileges, I feared rejection. This fear did not motivate me to make positive decisions for myself or others. It motivated me to stay out of trouble--to lay low. I believe that is a major contributing factor of the many break downs in the youth of our society.
Trust must be reestablished. A pledge of trust must be developed between a mentor and student. A culture of safety and trust must be developed in our classrooms and meetings so that children are not afraid to take risks. Children must be encouraged to explore and inquire. If fear is the ruling overseer, how will children feel about taking those educational risks.
It is time to look at our learning cultures and embrace new ways to establish trust in our mentoring relationships.
I personally was raised this way. I feared spankings, I feared being yelled at, I feared losing privileges, I feared rejection. This fear did not motivate me to make positive decisions for myself or others. It motivated me to stay out of trouble--to lay low. I believe that is a major contributing factor of the many break downs in the youth of our society.
Trust must be reestablished. A pledge of trust must be developed between a mentor and student. A culture of safety and trust must be developed in our classrooms and meetings so that children are not afraid to take risks. Children must be encouraged to explore and inquire. If fear is the ruling overseer, how will children feel about taking those educational risks.
It is time to look at our learning cultures and embrace new ways to establish trust in our mentoring relationships.
Life Lesson- Respond to Adults
I want my children to create for themselves a positive vibe with grown ups. The famous Golden Rule follows this lesson. If we want respect, we must give respect. Even adults will develop a respect for children and vice versa if we will learn to be respectful to one another.
KIDS-- When an adult speaks to you, respond with a "yes maam" or "No sir." Just nodding or saying anything else is simply not acceptable. Doing this will bring respect to you from adults. They will treat you differently.
ADULTS-- Take the time to respond to your children. A simple nod or "uh-huh" from you can show disinterest. It is our responsibility as mentors to our children to build their confidence and show the same respect that many times we should require in responding to one another. It is also important that your children see you model this in your own life to others.
This life lesson will promote respectful culture and successful relationships.
KIDS-- When an adult speaks to you, respond with a "yes maam" or "No sir." Just nodding or saying anything else is simply not acceptable. Doing this will bring respect to you from adults. They will treat you differently.
ADULTS-- Take the time to respond to your children. A simple nod or "uh-huh" from you can show disinterest. It is our responsibility as mentors to our children to build their confidence and show the same respect that many times we should require in responding to one another. It is also important that your children see you model this in your own life to others.
This life lesson will promote respectful culture and successful relationships.
Mentoring Children
Mentoring children has always been a priority in my life. In college, I took 4 years to prepare myself for the education field. Being an educator in the public school system was quite a joy for me, but it did not occur to me that being a mentor in a child's life was a key part of my job until my own children have reached the age of learning from me.
As I have reflected on re-entering the classroom, I want to come in with set objectives of what I can accomplish for a group of children in a given year. I want to make sure that I teach the standards given to my grade level; but more than that, I want to instill a love for life and learning in the children in my classroom. I want my children to exit my class feeling that they were apart of something significant. I want "Gifted Greg" and "Struggling Susie" to both leave my classroom proud of their individual contributions given within the assigned year. I want the children I mentor for the year to carry basic life lessons with them on into their education and their world.
Saying that, I plan to collect life lessons to establish the learning culture for my future classes. These blogs will be labeled Life Lessons for future reference. However, I must give credit to Ron Clark and his book "The Essential 55" which has inspired me to adopt my own essentials for the children that I mentor.
As I have reflected on re-entering the classroom, I want to come in with set objectives of what I can accomplish for a group of children in a given year. I want to make sure that I teach the standards given to my grade level; but more than that, I want to instill a love for life and learning in the children in my classroom. I want my children to exit my class feeling that they were apart of something significant. I want "Gifted Greg" and "Struggling Susie" to both leave my classroom proud of their individual contributions given within the assigned year. I want the children I mentor for the year to carry basic life lessons with them on into their education and their world.
Saying that, I plan to collect life lessons to establish the learning culture for my future classes. These blogs will be labeled Life Lessons for future reference. However, I must give credit to Ron Clark and his book "The Essential 55" which has inspired me to adopt my own essentials for the children that I mentor.
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